I finally took the time to read this article in this month's Christianity Today magazine. Russel D. Moore writes about "Why every Christian is called to rescue orphans." I began reading page 19 and when I got to the end of the page...I gasped....I wasn't sure I could turn the page to continue reading. My heart was in my throat! Russel is describing a trip to Russia that he and his wife made to meet their one year old sons. It was the first trip of two that are required for Russian adoptions. It BROKE MY HEART to read the words he so eloquently wrote on that first page. I am in tears again as I type this.
God speaks to me in the shower....there I said it! I believe it is the only place in my life where it is quiet and I can really listen to Him. The place where he allows the thoughts he so urgently wants me to "get" to enter my brain. Perhaps it's the process of scrubbing my mind of my daily dirt that allows His cleansing thoughts to enter, I don't know. But, non the less, today was one of those days where I couldn't wait to get downstairs and log onto this blog so I could post my feeling and thoughts. I believe with all that is in me that these thoughts are prompted from the HS (Holy Spirit).
This is part of what I NEED for those of you reading this to *HEAR.* Russel D. Moore describes the Russian orphanage to be quiet...the place is filled with babies, but it is quiet. He writes, "I stopped and pulled on Maria's elbow. 'Why is it so quiet?' Both of us compared the stillness with the buzz and punctuated squeals that came from our church nursery back home.. Here, if we listened carefully enough, we could hear babies rocking themselves back and forth, the crib slats gently bumping against the walls. These children did not cry, because infants eventually learn to stop crying if no one ever responds to their calls for food, for comfort, for love. No one ever responded to these children. So they stopped. "
So, Russell and Maria walk into a room and meet their two one-year-old sons. They play with them and read books to them. They continue these visits for the days they are in the country to get aqyainted with their soon-to-be sons.
Another excerpt from the article: "On the last day of the trip, Maria and I arrived at the moment we had dreaded since the minute we recieved our adoption referral. We had to tell the boys goodbye, as by law we had to return to the United States and wait for the legal paperwork to be completed before returning to pick them up for good. After hugging and kissing them, we walked out into the quiet hallway as Maria shook with tears. And that's when we heard the scream."
My eyes filled with huge tears at this point in the article. I knew...I understood....because my girls experienced this in their orphanage lives.
When we placed Lilly in the little white crib, which sat alongside my twin-sized bed in our hotel room in China, she violently threw her head from side to side. The sight of her "head rolling" was extremely disturbing! We eventually figured out that it was her way of soothing herself. This behavior continued for a few weeks after we brought her home. Our rocking her and feeding her bedtime bottle and singing softly to her replaced the head-rolling. One day it disappeared forever!
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